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What To Do To Calm Yourself Down

 What to Do When You Get a Bad Report.

It’s the call you don’t want to get. A family member has been in a bad accident, or you get a bad report from a doctor.  What do you do! Panic takes over.  Fear takes over.  It’s hard to think clearly. 

This recently happened to me.  I was at a restaurant when I got a call from my son’s girlfriend.  She was crying and could hardly speak.  I knew something was wrong.  “What’s wrong”, I said.  “Doug’s been in a car accident.” I heard on the other end of the phone through the tears and sniffles.  “Calm down and tell me what you know”, I said.  “He’s still in the ER but they said he has a head trauma.”  I could feel myself calming my own brain down. I said, “Let’s not worry until we have something to worry about. Let’s wait until the doctors are finished evaluating him.  Let’s not jump to any conclusions or let our brain race with bad thoughts.”  I’m 800 miles away from Doug.  I anxiously wait to hear more news throughout the evening.  I get another call from his sister.  She’s upset and crying too.  She is at the hospital.  Doug looks bad.  He was thrown from the car and has grass in his hair and road rash on his head.  Waiting for news is hard.  

Stress causes your heart to pound and breathing becomes heavier, your body tenses up and sweat starts rolling off your forehead.  The fight or flight response has kicked in.  This happens has a protective mechanism in a perceived dangerous situation.  Adrenaline rush kicks in so that you can either run to safety or fight.  This is a natural response to a scary situation. 

The emotional symptoms of stress include becoming agitated, frustrated and moody.  The feeling of being overwhelmed or not in control, and a racing mind.

There are also physical symptoms of stress which include: headaches, upset stomach, body aches and pain, insomnia, chest pain and rapid heartbeat, and hands shaking.

Stress not only affects emotional and physical but mentally too. Cognitive symptoms may include worrying, racing thoughts forgetfulness, inability to focus, and poor judgement.

Here are some ways to calm yourself down so that you can focus and receive and process information in a crisis.

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  1. Deep Breathing- Take deep breaths in through your mouth and slowly exhale through your nose.  Repeat several times. This sends oxygen to your brain and calms down the stress response.
  2. Pray- Talk with God.  Form complete sentences.  Ask for peace and comfort. 
  3. Talk with a Friend- There’s something soothing about talking with a friend who is not in the fight or flight response that can calm you down. 
  4. Take a walk- Let out some of the energy. This is also a good time to pray.  This can lower your blood pressure.
  5. Hug someone- Hugging can reduce stress levels and slows the heart rate.  This can make you feel calm.  Social support is very important. 
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